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Wednesday, January 4, 2006

There's Something About Paper

What is it about writing on paper? I mean, seriously. I find myself much more inspired when I am holding a pen and sitting over a piece of paper or notebook. It's always been that way for me. There's just something about the idea of what a blank piece of paper can become.

However, that same inspiration that a blank piece of paper brings can also bring about a sense of apprehension. What if I fill this piece of paper and what I write is not acceptable? What if I destroy this item that brought me such inspiration by filling it with musings that are not worthy of the paper they are printed on? What then? I can never return that pristine piece of paper to its original condition. That unique source of inspiration is gone forever, I ruined it.

Maybe that explains why I have to restrain myself from buying new notebooks when I have several at home that I haven't put a single mark into yet. The pull of inspiration is equaled by the fear of mediocre musings. Thus is my plight.

Am I alone in this, or have you ever experienced the same thing?

1 comment:

pooks said...

I have horrible handwriting and my hands cramp if I write very long. I end up with a scribbley-scrawl that sometimes even I can't read, because I'm rushing to finish. All of which means I look at those beautiful journals and blank books and think how ugly they'd look if I wrote in them.

Then there's the problem that I'm used to writing on a computer and jotting back and forth and adding a phrase at the front of the sentence to make it more clear, or deleting and replacing -- all of which would make an even uglier and more difficult to read journal.

And finally there's the problem that if I wrote anything "important" enough to justify the nice book/journal/whatever, I wouldn't want to leave it laying around for other people to pick up and read, and those nice notebooks just call out, "Pick me up!"

That's why when I've kept journals for any reason I've used beat-up spirals that look unimportant.

I envy people who can scrawl an elegant script and even get words halfway right the first time....